Ray Lewis Claims Crime Will Rise if Lockout Continues...Didn't He Murder Someone?

In a "candid" interview with ESPN's Sal Paolantonio, Ray Lewis made a claim that crime will rise if there is no NFL season in 2011. He stated that, "people live through us...watch how much evil, crime will rise up if you take away our game".

Uh What? I hope I was not the only bro holding back tears of laughter after hearing this come out of Ray Ray's mouth. Yup, you're right Ray. Since there is no NFL this year I think I may go out an rob a few banks, maybe even sell a little dope. No wait that's way to miniscule, maybe I'll just be accused of murder like you, since I live through you and all! Forget school, forget work, there's no football so what better to do then become a criminal!?

Just because you're a self centered maniac does not mean the rest of us are. Yeah, we all love football Ray, but I am not about to go pull a hit an run because the NFL's in a labor dispute. Ray Lewis, if you want people to really live through you, maybe you should just keep your mouth shut. Oh, and holding back on the murder chargers couldn't hurt.

Geoff is a Pretty Cool Name

I refuse to be friends with someone named "Geoff", ever.  Instead of spelling it the easy way, this is the guy that will force everything to be way harder than it really is for his entire like, like having the name Geoff instead of Jeff.  Name one cool Geoff you know, you can't.  It kind of makes me mad just looking at it.  Geoff.  WTF is that?  No good, sorry Bro.

Are You Kidding Me Bro?

Last week I spent about 3 hours out of a day sitting under a tree with friends and smoking Hookah, not really moving.  At no moment in my life had I ever felt more like a hippie, and it was pretty great.  But this will not stop me from hating on the hippies in Ithaca. 

The no shaving/bathing habits are pretty nasty, but today I noticed a new hippie trait: Awful driving. 
Probably the only reason I noticed was because I was in a hurry, but the yuppies driving the hybrid, electric, solar powered, vegetable fueled Subaru station wagon in front of me felt the need to hit the brakes at every time they saw a little trickle of water on the side of the road that resembled a waterfall.  While there is no way the hippies outdo the Asians in the terrible driving category, hippies do one thing Asians don't, making hippies worse....

Hippies walk goats on leashes?  Are you kidding me Bro?  Downtown Ithaca, I'm just getting my goat some exercise, no big deal.  Pedro, there is so much wrong here, I don't even know where to begin.  The organic food is tasty and healthy, I can respect that, but the individualism this hairball is trying to force by walking a goat in the Ithaca Commons is just stupid. 

If you're a hippie, get off the road when you want to look at nature and shit, get your goats off the sidewalks. 

Finals are just about done now, happy summer SUNY Cortland, stay safe, stay fly.  Oh yea, IC SHIT.

Bro Tunes: The Cave Boys

Is this, or is this not, a match made in heaven? In this edition of Bro Tunes, The Cave Boys meet The BroCave.

These white boys come straight out of none other than Hip-Hop USA, Keene, New Hampshire. But with all seriousness, these guys have shown a lot of promise, effort, and potential since I first started listening to them a month or so ago. In return for their hard work, they were recently awarded "Best College Rappers" by The Campus Socialite.

Check out three favorite songs by the Cave Boy Crew, Life's Good, Change the World, and Learn to Fly (Feat. Erene Glimenakis). Find their album, "Now Boarding", sponsored on DatPiff, music videos on YouTube, and become a fan of the duo on Facebook.

Natural, distinctive, inspiring; these are just a few words to describe The Cave Boys. The two from UNH are just a couple of regular Cave Bros doing what they love, and you've gotta respect them, at least check them out for that.

Plus, don't forget to take a peek at up and comer Erene Glimenakis, who's featured in Learn to Fly. It's not the everyday bro listen, but she has definitely got talent.

LeBrick Chokes, But Shamrocks Run Out of Luck

Here's an entry from a potential new BroCave writer, let me know what you guys think... Vote 5 stars to get this Bro an account, 1 star for no Bro status.

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If you’re a Bro then you were watching the Heat-Celtics game tonight, and I pray that you all WITNESSED the Heat giving the worst closer in the game the final shot in regulation.  That’s right, LeBron James got the ball with twenty seconds left in a tie ball game and got stripped worse than Candy Bottom at the Topless Cabana.  

LeBrick got the chance at the last shot over “team leader”, Dwayne Wade, to try and get a leg up over the Celtics and take a 3-1 series lead.  Are you kidding me Bro? LeBron with the last shot? Has the last 8 years of him sucking on buzzer beaters meant nothing? Good call Spoelstra, you wouldn’t ever want to win the game and give the ball to, I don’t know, anyone else but LeBron?

At least the Celtics roster has an average age of 45 and couldn’t move during overtime to tie up the series.  Was anyone else thinking that if the Celtics won the game, all we would hear about for the next 4 years on SportsCenter is how LeBron got stripped on the last play? Besides Charles Barkley, I can’t stand hearing NBA analysts, but I hate it even more when they talk about the Heat. They lose one game, and it’s a National crisis.

I can see it now. “LeBron, you got stripped for the last shot, should Wade have shot it? Do you want to cry? What on earth will the Heat do to rebound?…..” 

No one cares. The answer to all those questions is that the man just sucks with a minute left and the Heat are fools for even giving him the ball. Bros, thank the sport gods that the Heat pulled it off so we don’t have to avoid SportsCenter Brett Favre style for the next month and turn our morning television pleasures to ABC Family.  

Keep at it LeBron, we’re all hoping you stop missing, not for your sake, but for the sake of watching SportCenter.

-Broverload

CollegeACB, A New Way to Talk Shit

I've been in college almost 2 full years now, and not until a little over a week ago did I find out about CollegeACB.  At a school as small as SUNY Cortland, a lot of people know each other, or at least recognize names.  CollegeACB give you with the ability to talk shit about someone else on campus anonymously.  For someone like me there aren't many things better to distract me from my homework than reading about the "Biggest Whores on Campus."  If you don't go to a community college (there's 3 listed on CollegeACB), then chances are your school is listed.  Check it out Bros.

Bro Tunes: Diggy Edition

It's tough living in the shadow of a parent, especially if that parent is Joseph Simmons, co-founder of Run DMC.  At the yound age of 16, Daniel "Diggy" Simmons has already established himself as one of the most promising young Hip-Hop musicians, and not just because of his father's name.

Above is Diggy's newest song featuring Bruno Mars called Click Clack Away.  I'm tune is fresh, the contrast between verses by Bruno Mars and Diggy work well with eachother, and the entire song is clever in general.  Find this single catching fire on HotNewHipHop, and become a fan on Facebook.